It Would Have Been Us

The following is a guest post by Bob Beal.  Many thanks to Bob for keeping in touch and sharing this with us to illustrate why this type of planning is so important not just for the what-ifs, but also for the genuine peace of mind.  We are so happy that this beautiful family is OK.

In the Winter of 2011, my wife and I sat down with Danielle to put together a plan that would make sure our 2 children were taken care of if we ever weren’t around anymore.  It was a challenging task but it needed to be done.  Danielle put together a wonderfully laid out arrangement that we are completely comfortable having for our family.  Little did we know that just having it in place would bring us such comfort so fast. When you confront you own mortality things get pretty serious, pretty quickly.

One year later in March 2012 my wife and daughter were involved in a life-threatening “jaws of life” level car accident. Our medical documents were tested and having our plan in place brought a measure of immediate relief to an otherwise awful situation.

Then this past August we were on a family vacation in the Rocky Mountains in Colorado. Late one afternoon were returning from a day trip to Aspen, driving along a four lane highway with a jersey barrier dividing the east bound from west bound lanes. My 8 year old daughter was complaining about starting to feel car sick so we moved her to the front passenger seat knowing it wasn’t the safest place for a child to sit but not wanting her puking in the car then either.


Just about then, my wife, who was driving, moved into the right lane to let a motorcycle pass us. He wasn’t speeding or doing anything wrong; he was just a guy out on his Ducati going down the road. He opened up a gap of about 50 to 75 feet ahead up us and coincidently the jersey barrier stopped at that same point.  A white Ford coming east bound veered over into his lane and it was a direct hit, a head on collision of two vehicles both going highway speed.  It was instant. It was violent. It was brutal.

The oncoming car went by us in the wrong direction with a gap of about five feet, the length of a typical house broom.  Our car was hit with debris from the bike. My wife managed to stop our car on the shoulder, in the grass.  The Ducati was laying there still running, badly leaking fuel.  I walked over and shut it off while my wife stayed with our kids, who were understandably terrified, trying to reassure them that we were all okay.

Without going into more details, we all had an avalanche of “what if” scenarios playing out in our minds for at least the next few days.  The most chilling of which was that if the Ford hadn’t hit the motorcycle, it would have been us that were next in his path. An experience like is difficult to make sense of.  We repeatedly came back to our planning with Danielle as a huge source of comfort.  If something tragic ever happened, we knew what would take place and that our children would be taken care of. We still talk about it once in a while, but we also reassure our children that we love them and have made sure that they are going to be all right, no matter what.


About Danielle G. Van Ess

Danielle G. Van Ess is a Massachusetts (born and raised), experienced estate planning and small business attorney who helps her clients protect and preserve what matters most to them. To learn more, please visit: or call: 781-740-0848